Spunky Shallon Lester has accumulated more than her fair share of embarrassing stories. In this collection of hilarious essays, she chronicles her dorky, daring, and awkward journey from waitress at the ninth circle of hell known as Houston's Time Square restaurant, to columnist at one of New York's leading gossip magazines, to MTV reality star, gleefully weaving in stories of all boys she's loved, lost, and avenged along the way.

Complete with cringe-worthy tales of:

-The time a new boyfriend found the stockpile of Magnum condoms hidden under her bed

-Getting caught stealing (borrowing?) bacon from her local supermarket

-Unwittingly getting romantically involved with the leader of a mafia ring

-Being dumped on Valentines Day (for the second year in a row), just minutes before being forced to attend El Concierto Del Amor con Marc Anthony y Jennifer Lopez. Alone. Did I mention on Valentine's day?

-An unfortunate sholess, sweaty, shoe-less run in with Ed Westwick and Chace Crawford on an East Village Street Corner

With a fresh and irresistible voice that makes you want to sit down and rehash last night's misadventures over martinis, Lester speaks volumes to anyone who's even been young, ambitious, and a little bit slutty.